I wrote this on 1/30/2020.

I went to a follow-up with the psychiatrist, where we basically talked about meds.  If you have ADHD, you are not producing enough dopamine, and there are two types of drugs you can use – stimulants like Adderall, and non-stimulants like Wellbutrin.  After some discussion I said I wanted to try the stimulant type.  If for some reason that doesn’t work for me I’ll try Wellbutrin.

In order to get the Adderall Rx I had to do a drug screen urine test and also an EKG.  Both of those came out fine.  I was kind of amused to read my urine test results. Look at all these drugs that I am NOT TAKING:

  • Cocaine – NONE DETECTED
  • THC (Cannabinoids) – NONE DETECTED
  • Methadone – NONE DETECTED
  • Opiates – NONE DETECTED
  • Benzodiazepines – NONE DETECTED
  • Barbiturates – NONE DETECTED
  • Phencyclidine – NONE DETECTED
  • Amphetamine – NONE DETECTED
  • Oxycodone – NONE DETECTED
  • Creatinine – 43.9 mg/dL (normal range!)

So I got prescribed a low dose of Adderall, the prolonged-release type which I can’t remember what is called, and I will start taking it tomorrow.

There were no specific injunctions against coffee, but they did say to keep tabs on how I feel.  So I think I will drink coffee sparingly tomorrow.  Maybe a cup of decaf before work and say a small cup of weak coffee at work?

I can’t believe it.

I feel relieved that I got a diagnosis, and also PISSED that I didn’t get one before now.  Also upset because, given my skill at masking, I can’t see how there’s any way anyone in my life would have recognized that there was something wrong with me. And I could have used some help.

Thinking about my school history and work history in light of my diagnosis should probably be another entry. Or a series of them.